Saiunkoku book 15 Chapter 2 (1/??)

He walked into the government offices, in the style of the modern youth, jangling, seemingly lacking all enthusiasm. He happened to overhear the conversation between the young officials passing by.

“Kou Shuurei has disappeared?”
“Yeah, I heard that. She didn’t come back for some reason. And she disappeared with a man.”
“Eh?! She ran off with him?”
“No, no. It was a kid around ten. You know, that Minister of the Cave of the Immortals, who was carrying around Uu-sama.”
“Ah! He’s got a really pretty face. And a unique atmosphere. So what happened?”
“Who knows? The former supernumerary officials are taking turns every day trying to get into the Censorate, but they’re always chased off.”

Since he was passing through, another conversation faintly came into his years.

“She was an imperial messenger, right? So she ran off in the middle without getting near the house of her clan?”
The voice was filled with distaste, as if the official was grimacing, pulling his brows together.
“….That’s probably it—- So then–That?”
“….Right? That’s it, probably.”
The two passers-by nodded their heads slowly.
“–She ran off. So she didn’t want to marry the king thaaaaaat much….”
The trendily dress young man who was walking while listening to others’ conversation, was brought up a bit short by that.
“…So his bride ran off before the wedding. I feel so sorry for the king–”
“I can see that from Kou Shuurei…. ‘Don’t joke around, I’m not a woman who’ll meekly agree to a political marriage! You can’t get rid of me like that!’ or something of the sort. Won’t she wait for the excitement to die down, wander around working, and then come back when the king has given up?”
“She’s the sort who likes to work. The sort who would throw away a man before her work. —- Even if he’s that good-looking king, she’s got no mercy. That’s just like Kou Shuurei. If I could marry a beautiful girl, I’d give up working!”
“Hmm, certainly. Kou Shuurei, she’s more manly than a man. The king’s going to go down shamefully in history….”
The trendily dressed young man scratched his head.
(…..Ehhh……So that’s how they’re talking about it….)
Walking leisurely, he reached the Censorate. Whenever he went before a door, guards and officials looked at him suspiciously, and although he had proof he was a censor, getting through this door was a trial. When he got to the door of the head official of the Censorate, he had reached the point where he himself was asking “am I really a censor?”
When he gave his name, he was then allowed through. Having gotten there, after thinking about what expression and attitude he should take, he couldn’t figure out what he should do, so with the same steps as before, he walked in with an easy stride.

Without any hesitation, he spoke before his superior, his tanuki earrings waving.
“…..Um—What’s with how the information’s leaked out? Did someone give away the game? Chief.”
Ki Kouki rubbed his temple. Somebody. …. As always, this man hit straight to the center with the first shot.
“…first, why don’t you report to me, Shin Suou.”

**********

Ryuuki’s office had never before been enveloped in as heavy an atmosphere. Neither Seiran nor Shuuei nor Kouyuu had any idea of how to make him feel better. Since they had never experienced anything like this, they didn’t know what should be done. They hung around each other, shot glances at one another, elbowed each other, kicked each other, and finally, Shuuei got up his determination and made a move.
Slowly, he spoke to Ryuuki.
“Um, your majesty….? Please don’t be so depressed….”
Ryuuki, who was sitting without even budging in his seat, as if he had been put in his chair a hundred years before, shook his head, causing his bangs to wave around.
“What do you mean by saying, ‘don’t be so depressed,’ Shuuei….”
At this strange voice, which sounded as though it was coming from the depths of hell, Shuuei threw his head back.
“Now, now, if Shuurei-dono has run off, isn’t that what always happens? Though this time she’s run off in a bit of a showy manner. That’s just like Shuurei, thanks to this, people are all pitying your majesty! All over the nation, people are feeling sorry for his majesty, left at the altar sobbing.”
“Ah, you fool, Shuuei!”
Before Kouyuu could stop him, Shuuei had stepped on a mine. If it was known that an imperial messenger had gone missing in the midst of their mission, then it would be seen as dereliction of duty. They had been warned to prepare for criticisms to come down on Ryuuki and Shuurei—
But no one had predicted that the rumors would take this form.
The king had been left at the altar, before the nation.
The rumor that Shuuri, who had gone missing while on her official duties, had disappeared to avoid her marriage with the king, rather than because she was shirking her duty, spread through the court rapidly. Actually it was almost frightening how fast it had been.
(Why—!!?)
Probably because it sounded more plausible than Kou Shuurei being remiss in her duties, because everyone at court had heard of the rumor, since then, every day when Ryuuki went into meetings, the officials would look at him with warm, sympathetic glances, and when he returned to the inner palace, the deeply interested glances of the court ladies made him feel uncomfortable there, and single officials handed him documents asking if he wished to join their support group for unpopular men.
And, the most important reason why Ryuuki could not get back to normal was that Seiran and the others could not show the rumor to be false. Ryuuki had seen it. When they had heard the rumor for the first time, Seiran, Shuuei, and Kouyuu had averted their eyes from Ryuuki, almost as if to say “….could it have been that?”
(That’s too cruel!!)
Ryuuki tearfully lashed out at Shuuei. —Please don’t be depressed?!?
“Be quiet, Shuuei! I don’t want to hear that from you! You got totally rejected by Shusui!”
“Wha….I…I wasn’t rejected! Because I haven’t confessed yet!”
“If you were rejected before confessing, you should be even more ashamed than us! Even though you said ‘I’ll take the responsibility,’ you were turned down! What do you mean you weren’t rejected? Don’t you think you’re a poor loser?!”
‘He was rejected?’ both Kouyuu and Seiran were thinking. This was the first time they heard this. It seemed Shuuei had been through a lot on his return to Ran Province.
The lord and retainer had much in common.
Ryuuki fiercely made his case, banging on his desk.
“I…I wasn’t left! …I shouldn’t have been! See, the night when I asked Shuurei to enter the Inner Palace, we were like the protagonists of a poignant, melancholy tragedy. It was a scene that the audience wouldn’t fail to wipe their tears on their sleeves at. ‘Shuurei… I’m sorry.’ ‘It’s alright, Ryuuki’ It was like that!! It’s impossible that she would run off with Riou like that! Even if he were ten years older, it would still be impossible!”
It would still be impossible after ten years…. Everyone grew still more sad. Definitely, once Riou passed twenty, he would probably be, both inside and out, a rather impressive man.
“What, sounds like ‘after the tragic proposal, no matter how much they try, there can only be an unhappy marriage’..”
“Who…who is that?!”
Everyone turned to look at the speaker, and their eyes bulged to see the young man standing there. The first one to speak was Seiran.
“Those tanuki earrings—Tan-tan-kun?!”
“…Figuring out who I am by the tanukis….. You haven’t changed.”
He was somewhat more tanned than he was the last time he had seen him, but definitely this was Shin Suou.
“….I had been here from before. If you’re going to talk about complicated things, I’ll come back again later—”
Suou turned to go, but in the next second, Seiran, Shuuei, and Kouyuu grabbed him, and forcefully dragged him before Ryuuki.
“What happened to my lady! Answer, Tan-tan?”
“You came alone?! What about Ensei?!”
“Where’s Riou-kun? Tell us what happened!”
Jumped on by the three of them, Suou, squeezed tightly, really felt like he was going to die.
“Hey…hey, I’ll talk, so let go! If you don’t, I’m going!”
Suddenly, someone pulled him out by the arm. Suou fell on his rear, and tearfully coughed.
“….I come back after all this time, and this happens? Urgh, Kiyou really might be unlucky for me.”
Someone brought him a cup of water. As if showing the turmoil of the person holding it, the surface of the water was rippling a bit. When he raised his head, it was the king. Like the time he had seen him at Nine Colors Cove, he was making a sad face.
“Even if you returned alone, thank goodness you’re safe. Could you please tell us what happened?”
Suou smiled slightly, and accepted the cup.
“….it’s not a very happy story, though.”
Where to begin, Suou mumbled to himself. The water in the cup made its final ripple.

*****
When they arrived at the checkpoint to meet as planned, Suou could not believe his own eyes. When he went into the room, there was Shuurei lying in a bed, weakened, difficult to look at. When she listlessly turned her head and looked at Suou with dim eyes, he couldn’t believe it was the same Shuurei he had said goodbye to in the summer. Perhaps it was because she was half-conscious because of a high fever, but although she was looking at Suou, she gave no sign of recognizing him.
Suou looked at Riou, then at Ensei. He then grabbed Ensei’s sleeve.
“…Wait a sec.”
Suou pulled Ensei out of the checkpoint. It was evening, so the insects were making so much noise it was irritating. When they got to a pine tree standing some ways away, Suou glared at Ensei.

“….Ensei….What’s up with this?”
Ensei scratched his head, wearing a stern expression. This was the first time that Suou had seen Ensei like this, and from that alone he could guess how bad Shuurei’s condition was.
“…Until she left Kiyou, she was normal. But the moment she left the gate, the young lady’s health started to crumble. She felt bad and started to get dizzy. But then after she rested awhile, she got better.”
“Ah….’Kiyou drunkenness’”
Suou bowed his head ambiguously. That wasn’t an especially rare thing. Often people felt sick for about an hour after leaving Kiyou, and he had heard that sensitive individuals were particularly prone to getting that. It sounded like it was like there was a burden on those whose “bodies were used to Kiyou.”
“But when she went to Ran Province, nothing really happened to the young miss? I heard that usually “Kiyou drunkeness” is over after resting for one or two days, and then they get back to normal.”
Ensei violently mussed up his hair while looking in the direction of the checkpoing and the baggage.
“Tantan, from here I’m going to talk about Riou’s explanation and my guesses.”
Suou made a suspicious face. He had heard of the head of the Ministry of the Cave of the Immortals, who had been sent there as a coordinator.
“Riou is that kid? What do you mean? He knows something?”
“Probably. The young lady doesn’t know the important points either, so said he couldn’t talk. Somehow, it looks like she’s always been overworking herself, so her body got weaker and weaker. Suou’s expression changed a bit. Definitely, Kou Shuurei probably hadn’t rested herself this half year. Suou had seen with his own eyes the amount of overwhelming amount of work she was doing.
As if he could read Suou’s thoughts from his expression, Ensei nodded.
“It’s been like that since the young lady was in Sa province. And so it’s been around a year? … And awhile back, she spent three days sleeping in the Ministry of the Cave of the Immortals, and Riou took care of her. That time, Riou told her to rest too. That’s why I thought I would make her rest once things had calmed down.”
“But, this time she’s been sent to undo the embargo as an imperial messenger, so she set out without time to rest then…”
Suou also knew from getting all the available information at checkpoints that about the events that had happened one after the other, the fall of the Civil Administration Secretary and his Undersecretary, the strike of the Kou officials, and the economic embargo. Since it was a matter of the Kou clan, that all of it probably involved Shuurei, too. That alone would have been an abnormal amount of work.
“….Hey, could it be she was like that since she was in Kiyou?”
“No, from what I saw, after she had slept for a while she was like normal. Really, right after she was out of the gate at Kiyou, it happened quick. From what Riou said, Kiyou is a “pure place,” so even if she had a weak body once she slept, she could get back to normal.”
“Ehhhh? So once she left Kiyou, then she started to feel the burden, he said?”
“That’s what Riou said. Probably, around half of it is true, I think.”
Maybe it was because Ensei had spent a long time living on Silver Wolf Mountain with Master Nan that his senses were sharper than a normal humans. He could see the spirits well, and he could feel on his skin the special nature of Kiyou. Ensei could sometimes see the creatures Shuurei called Shiro and Kuro in a different form. Their presence especially reminded him of the wolf named Ginjirou who had lived on Silver Wolf Mountain. So that’s why he somehow understood that Shuurei’s health had collapsed once she left Kiyou, and also that it probably wasn’t only because of that.
“…At first, when she drank Riou’s medicine and slept, she got back to normal. But as we got farther from Kiyou, she got so bad it was like she was falling off a hill…. Now, Riou’s medicine only works enough to make her relax. She’s conscious, but she mostly doesn’t eat anything.”
“…..Hey, you brought her in that state here?”
“Riou kept on saying to the young lady that it would be better for her to go back to Kiyou, but she kicked away that thought. She stubbornly told me to keep driving the carriage to Kou Province. She got about as bad as she is now around a few days before the halfway point between Kiyou and Kou province. It’s too late for her to return and for a replacement to go in her place. So, it would be faster for us to rush to the Kou clan and get nursing for her there.”
Suou leaned agains the tree irritatedly. He could imagine what Shuurei had done and said only too easily. The imperial messenger was the king’s representative, and also, the embargo was a matter of the utmost importance.
“…But…but look, however you look at it, she can’t be the messenger like this?!?! I can see this just with a glance. If this goes badly…”
“I understand. That’s why I came flying here in the carriage. I’m an assistance censor so I can’t replace her as imperial messenger, but you can. You’ve been promoted to censor, right?”
Suou was astonished. Wait a second.
“Me!??! I’m going to be the imperial messenger and persuade the Kou clan?! I came here for something else, don’t decide this for me—– No, sorry…… that’s…..if you tell me to do it, I can… but I can’t make any guarantees…..”
Suou had remembered how bad Shuurei’s condition was, and changed his words in the middle of saying them. Thinking now about face, as though she had fainted, even Suou couldn’t say he couldn’t be her replacement. Ensei’s eyes grew round. If this had been a little before, he might have changed his words, but he would have ended up saying it was completely impossible.
“…But, even then, probably she wouldn’t be satisfied with your idea?”
Ensei smiled bitterly, as if to say ‘exactly.’ As usual, Tantan was sharp.
“Yeah. The young lady was entrusted with the post of imperial messenger because she’s a lady of the direct line of the Kou clan. They pushed it on her cause someone else, if they didn’t get it right, would be chased off and wouldn’t get a meeting, maybe. She knows that too. Especially since Shouka-san has returned to the Kou clan. Right now, the odds are good she could get in through her father and meet the head of the Kou clan. That’s why we were so rushed. If the embargo isn’t lifted before the grains can arrive before winter comes, then it’s a matter of life and death for Haku Province and Koku Province. I understand why she was insisting so hard we couldn’t go back. Riou and I were also wavering, so that’s why, complaining, we got this far.
Suou looked at Ensei, and then asked him this. “…Is that all? I had heard that the young miss was going to enter the Inner Palace once she was done with this job, and quit.”
Really, Suou had gone straight to the sharp part. His instincts were unrivaled. Though he could dissemble, Ensei answered honestly.
“That seems like it. …. I also thought, looking at her say ‘we absolutely can’t go back to Kiyou until I finish my work,’ that maybe it was that she didn’t want to go back. And maybe that’s why I couldn’t bring her back.
A moment after that, Suou scratched at his head.

She sensed that someone had pulled up a chair and was sitting beside her. When Shuurei opened her heave eyelids, there was Suou. Riou and Ensei were not there. With a hand to his cheek, Suou looked at Shuurei. It had been a long time since she had seen that gesture.

Shuurei smiled a bit. When she saw Suou’s face, she was relieved in a different way from when she was with Ensei and Seiran.
“…Tantan… please don’t tell me to return or to let you go in my place….”
Tantan was shocked, so much so he couldn’t speak for awhile. He spoke, though.
“Is that what you’re saying, smiling when you’re so pale you look like you’re going to die? You haven’t changed–”
“Please, it’s my last task. An important task. When I think of Koku Province and Haku Province, I can’t allow myself to say I can’t do it. If we switch in between, the measures will be delayed. I’ll only allow a switch in imperial messengers when I die. If I die, do as you like. But as long as I’m not dead, let me do what I must do. Please…”
Suou looked down on Shuurei. Her face was red, perhaps because she still had a fever. Suou wet a cloth from the pail of water at the betside, and put it on Shuurei’s forehead.
“….You probably feel too much responsiblity because it’s the Kou clan who set the embargo.”
Shuurei did not answer, but from her expression, he could tell at a glance. That the Kou clan would do things by such means made her feel deep sadness and responsiblity. That was half of it. The other half—
Suou looked at the documents in a bundle beside the pail. He had heard from Ensei that she had received information about how far the influence of the embargo had spread each time they passed through a checkpoint, and when she was conscious, she read through those documents.
I also thought, when I looked at her, that maybe it was that she didn’t want to go back.
Ensei looked like he was careless, but really, he was the one who understood Kou Shuurei the best, Suou thought.
“You say ‘I’ll work, even if I die,’ but it feels like ‘it would be better to work and then die.’”
“Tantan?”
He took some documents. Normally, someone wouldn’t come this far. Even this woman. Even so, she was doing it.
“It looks to me like you’re running away in your work, so that you can forget, even for a second, what you don’t want to think about.”
Shuurei’s eyes, damp because of her fever, widened. Until Suou had said that to her, Shuurei herself had not even thought of that. Then, greatly moved, her eyes started to water.
“Your ‘last task.’” Meaning that after you’ve finished with your work as an imperial messenger, you’re going back to Kiyou, quitting, and entering the Inner Palace?”
He was talking about it like she was going to jail. Actually, for Shuurei there wasn’t much of a difference, Suou thought.
“Running away into your work is like you, though. It would be impossible for me. You’re making a face like it’s the end of the world, like you’re saying ‘I don’t understand, but I have a feeling I’m making a huge mistake somewhere. But I don’t know what that is, so I don’t want to think about it.’ If you weren’t running away from reality, you wouldn’t go this far, normally. Even you. That’s easy to understand. At base, you’re an ordinary girl.”
Within Shuurei’s hazy consciousness, she vaguely heard these words. Tears of a sort different from those caused by her fever welled up at the corners of her eyes. Somehow, she felt that what he had said had struck deeply and truly. As usual, Tantan was merciless, honest, and sharp. Bu this time Shuurei didn’t understand. Running away from reality? ‘It would be better to work and then die,’ more than ‘ll work, even if I die.’ She didn’t know the reason, but… when he had said that to her, she had realized. It might be like that. Her fever rose up, and her head and heart confused, Shuurei slept as though she had fainted.

Ensei knocked at the door lightly, and came in with a bag of ice. He confirmed Shuurei’s condition with a practiced glance. Knowing that the cloth had just been placed on her forehead, he put the bag of ice on it. While Suou watched this from the chair, he recalled the king he had met at Nine Colors Cove. Suou had met the king twice, once during the counterfeiting affair, and again then. Even so, he knew the king was in love with Shuurei. At the same time, he had a sense that the two of them were oddly incompatible. He especially didn’t know what sort of affection that Shuurei had towards the king. Although she probably didn’t hate him if she worked that hard for the him, at the same time he had a sense that she had at that time unconsciously drawn a line…. Now, he thought he had an idea why.
“Hey, did the national exam admit women only the time the young miss took it? After that, it’s like the king forgot about it.”
“I don’t know if he forgot it, but definitely, it only happened when she took it.”
Hmm, Suou muttered. Ensei seemed uninterested and didn’t ask about this sudden question. Suou had a feeling that Ensei had been thinking what Suou was now thinking for a hundred years. Suou had caught on that the king and Shuurei had met before she became an official somehow. If that was so, and the king had put into place the exam for women for Shuure’s sake alone.
…Shuurei was always talking about work, work, work, more than was necessary.
It wasn’t only that she had to work harder than normal because she was a woman, or she wouldn’t be acknowledged. What if there was something she felt guilty about, deep within her unconscious, and that was the reason she drove herself so hard in her work?
(…for example, if she had, without really thinking anything of it, said ‘I want to become an official,’ and through that, the law was altered, what would she do? She can’t say anything about it anymore….)
Whatever she wished for would be granted. She would always be treated specially. Even if the laws of the country were bent.
What had Shuurei, who had seen that with her own eyes, thought within her heart? Was she happy? That wasn’t the case.
“….Right, she worked to achieve and achieve, and the only thing she could do was prove she was useful as an official…. It wasn’t about liking or hating it.”
If that really was the truth about the women’s exam. If feelings of love had entered into it, in the end, Shuurei would end up being immediately executed by the Censorate as a seductress who imperiled the country, and the king would from then on be treated as a fool who was only good for decorating the throne for the rest of his life. The feeling of incompatibility he got from them was probably from that. Shuurei had unconsciously realized it, but the king didn’t notice at all. For the king, love had began, but for Shuuei, it hadn’t begun yet. No, it couldn’t begin. At least not as long as the king hadn’t changed. Now, if she went forward, if she messed up, what would happen— Shuurei, somehow, had realized that. Their perspectives on “affection” were completely different.
However, the pieces on the board had been advanced by force. To that place where she had been thinking, if I don’t do this well, something terrible may happen. Suou muttered, looking at Shuurei, who was uncomfortably tossing and turning in bed.
“Ensei, I was thing something. That the young miss would run off somewhere far away once she had finished her task. Really, I did say, wouldn’t it be good to quit and get married, but that was cause if it’s painful, it’s okay to run off. But if that’s going to make her unhappy, then that’s another story.”
Ensei answered ‘that’s right,’ without much sign of having considered his reply, rather, as if he didn’t care. With response, Suou realized something. Ensei had always said he would fulfill Shuurei’s wishes. Without Suou needing to say it, probably he had already prepared for that choice. It was only Suou’s instinct, and it didn’t show a bit on Ensei’s face, but maybe it would happen in the very end. If that was so, Suou was relieved.
…..However, Suou’s guesses came true in a different form. A few days after, at the checkpoint on the border to Kou province, they heard that the head of the Kou clan had changed, and that he undone the embargo, and was going to the capital.
When Shuurei heard this as she was lying in the carriage, she only said “is that so” in a voice slighter than a sigh. Then, after she had written a report to the governor of Kou province and Ki Kouki, and some other documents, she muttered that since she had finished her work, she’d sleep a bit, and closed her eyes. Then, she didn’t open them again.

*****

Even now, Suou remembered many things about that time.

“—If I take her to the Hyou clan right away, maybe they can do something for her.”
Riou had taken Shuurei’s wrist, and said this with a face whiter than paper.
“If it’s only Kou Shuurei, I can take her right now. There’s a way. If we want to do something, then probably that’s the only way. But—But, she may not be able to come back.”
Riou looked very ambivalent, as though he was saying ‘I don’t know what to do.’ Up till then, Suou had though he was a very suspiciously adult kid, and at that time, he made a decision. Probably Ensei did the same. Before Suou could say something, Ensei opened his mouth.
“If there’s a possibility, then take there now.”
Riou bit his lips, flinching. Suou nodded as well.
“It’s okay, go then. Even if it’s just you. I trust you too.”
“….W..why?”
“Cause when even Ensei said ‘bring her there’ you made a really conflicted face. If you were plotting something, Ensei definitely wouldn’t want you to take her. He’d break everything into bits and return with her. That’d be the worst. —-The partnership between the young miss and Ensei is like that.”
Riou raised his head with a start. Suou laughed lightly.
“You know, we’re talking about the young miss? If she wants to get back, she’ll kick anyone out of the way and come back, definitely. So there’s no need for you to worry. If she’s alive, that is.”
At this words which struck far too well the bull’s eye, Ensei smiled strainedly. It was exactly as Tantan had said. Both Ensei and Suou had remembered the one eyed man who had come as the messenger of the “Hyou clan auntie” to take Shuurei way. When Riou said ’she might not be able to come back,’ he probably meant something different from death. That was why when Ensei had seen that Riou was conflicted over whether to bring her back, Ensei had decided as well. As long as Shuuei could live, that would be okay. More importantly, both Ensei and Suou knew that it had been thanks to Riou that Shuurei had been able to come this far safely.
“–I’ll leave her to you.”

Riou was silent, biting his lips, and then lowered his head, as if something had been dispelled.
….Then, Riou and Shuurei ‘disappeared,’ literally.
After they had gone, Suou was slightly relieved. Even at the worlds “she might not be able to return.”
It was as if the god of fate had prepared an escape route for her, he thought. With this, she could definitely rest. She would have time. Time to think, and time to run away. Yes, if she wanted to return, she would. And if that wasn’t the case…. that was okay too. That was why Suou only said “ain’t this okay?’ Ensei didn’t answer.

Notes:
I’m not too satisfied with some of the ways I’ve rendered Suou’s and Ensei’s speech. Both of them are very informal, and so I think I make them sound too formal. :/ I also may just switch out their ways of referring to Shuurei to the Japanese, because I’m so sick of trying to find these kinds of equivalents, which sound unnatural.

Commentary:

Tan-tan returns, finally. I can kind of see why he was exiled by the author. XD He sees things too clearly. There is later a good explanation of what he’s been doing all this time, also. Note also that Suou and Ensei have no particular interest in Ryuuki. It’s Shuurei they are loyal to.

Anyway, with this passage, the author kind of overturns some of the assumptions of the first three volumes.